To people handling 911 emergency calls –
What’s up Guys, long time !!!
Last time we met, you guys were taking me to hospital for a cut which we consider as ... I mean ... what to say !! we would cut more in order to feel the pain if we are defining cut here. I mean it was nothing and for that my insurance had to pay 38000 dollars, now I totally know why doctors are so successful in US. I mean for no reason I was brutally man handled as if I am ... don’t know ... may be Thanks giving touching competition, whoever touches more wins the prize, let me not get into detail here.
Okay I am writing this mail on behalf of Safety of pride Animal caring god knows what Association. The other day I was driving in my car on hoyt street, the street comes after grove street joining strawberry hill road, but don’t go in strawberry hill road, take a left, actually it’s not a left, it’s left deviation, I mean I can’t explain it further check Google maps for details.
Okay anyway I was withholding the red signal, and suddenly it appeared green. But I couldn’t move further, and people started honking, it was like I heard the first honk in US. I had to look back to see who honked, but couldn't see that person. Meanwhile the light again turned red, then again green red green red green red sequence followed, until someone called 911 to report about my driving skills, I mean I was not even driving and how could he judge about my driving skills, anyway, I am still searching for that person who called 911.
911 team arrived, and started talking to me with their usual cliche dialogue, god knows why it is called Miranda warnings, to me it looks like a movie dialogue, I always wanted to experience it personally, “You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do can and will be held against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided for you”. After hearing this I felt like I am in a movie :P
Anyway, they asked me for the reason to block the road, I told them I couldn't proceed further since there was trail of ants crossing the road, now if I cross the road I might kill god knows so many ants. I was under the assumption that animal protection law is same for all, and there is no racism involved in that as well.
However, I don’t care about racism, I am animal loving person, although I hate tiger lion snakes and lizard, tiger lion for obvious reason they are like hungry all the time. I personally do not like snakes movement. Why does it has to go in zigzag man, didn’t it tried going straight once,I would suspect lack of training and last but not the least Lizard, OMG, they are like creepy, I tried to watch them once and ended up watching their Reproduction mechanism, first of all I have no idea who was chasing whom, so correlated them with humans, usually male chases female. Damn it was scary. This is one of the reason that made me take a decision not to marry.
Okay so according to Animal protection, ants need to be cared as well. I have two pets, I renamed them as ant#1 and ant#2. They don’t hear human voices, so I cleverly use sugar law. According to which, ants always gets attracted to Sugar irrespective of their position, weight, height, all eight dimensions, take whichever you want.
Okay now I explained this situation to 911 people, and they were like laughing, and I was like holyshit, here we go, racism is still around. I am requesting on behalf of animal lovers bla bla association, Can we create a separate lane for ants, so that they are not brutally killed on the roads. Also, could you please cancel my traffic ticket for 300 dollars, I was just trying to be generous and I was not all blocking the traffic.
Regards,
Dave
What’s up Guys, long time !!!
Last time we met, you guys were taking me to hospital for a cut which we consider as ... I mean ... what to say !! we would cut more in order to feel the pain if we are defining cut here. I mean it was nothing and for that my insurance had to pay 38000 dollars, now I totally know why doctors are so successful in US. I mean for no reason I was brutally man handled as if I am ... don’t know ... may be Thanks giving touching competition, whoever touches more wins the prize, let me not get into detail here.
Okay I am writing this mail on behalf of Safety of pride Animal caring god knows what Association. The other day I was driving in my car on hoyt street, the street comes after grove street joining strawberry hill road, but don’t go in strawberry hill road, take a left, actually it’s not a left, it’s left deviation, I mean I can’t explain it further check Google maps for details.
Okay anyway I was withholding the red signal, and suddenly it appeared green. But I couldn’t move further, and people started honking, it was like I heard the first honk in US. I had to look back to see who honked, but couldn't see that person. Meanwhile the light again turned red, then again green red green red green red sequence followed, until someone called 911 to report about my driving skills, I mean I was not even driving and how could he judge about my driving skills, anyway, I am still searching for that person who called 911.
911 team arrived, and started talking to me with their usual cliche dialogue, god knows why it is called Miranda warnings, to me it looks like a movie dialogue, I always wanted to experience it personally, “You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do can and will be held against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided for you”. After hearing this I felt like I am in a movie :P
Anyway, they asked me for the reason to block the road, I told them I couldn't proceed further since there was trail of ants crossing the road, now if I cross the road I might kill god knows so many ants. I was under the assumption that animal protection law is same for all, and there is no racism involved in that as well.
However, I don’t care about racism, I am animal loving person, although I hate tiger lion snakes and lizard, tiger lion for obvious reason they are like hungry all the time. I personally do not like snakes movement. Why does it has to go in zigzag man, didn’t it tried going straight once,I would suspect lack of training and last but not the least Lizard, OMG, they are like creepy, I tried to watch them once and ended up watching their Reproduction mechanism, first of all I have no idea who was chasing whom, so correlated them with humans, usually male chases female. Damn it was scary. This is one of the reason that made me take a decision not to marry.
Okay so according to Animal protection, ants need to be cared as well. I have two pets, I renamed them as ant#1 and ant#2. They don’t hear human voices, so I cleverly use sugar law. According to which, ants always gets attracted to Sugar irrespective of their position, weight, height, all eight dimensions, take whichever you want.
Okay now I explained this situation to 911 people, and they were like laughing, and I was like holyshit, here we go, racism is still around. I am requesting on behalf of animal lovers bla bla association, Can we create a separate lane for ants, so that they are not brutally killed on the roads. Also, could you please cancel my traffic ticket for 300 dollars, I was just trying to be generous and I was not all blocking the traffic.
Regards,
Dave
